friday

i fear my reflection

i fear my mind

conquering my body
i hate myself
i want to leave me
can i come?
yes? no yes
i am going outside
to buy some sprite
i am going inside
i am sitting on the floor
you are there, you're wearing your costume
i am on the floor
i am not breathing
i am not
you are, oh so much
you are tall
you tie me up, pour water in my mouth
spines in spine
your hands touch flesh
blut zwischen meinen beinen
hass zwischen meinen beinen
hart zwischen deinen beinen
herz in meinem kopf 
hoffnungsgrad
süße stille, cotton candy
weiße räume 
ich öffne die lichtertür
geschmack in meinem mund
fülle und salz
drinnen, im schutz der hölle
ich streue zucker 
on my head
crack it open, hold another pose
hold it longer
just a little longer
we love you so much
we love you love you love you my dear 
we just want the best for you
i walk around
i step inside my head
i walk around and down and upside down
i see you are there i you have see you i am not i do not i do not i don't 
want
i am not i never was i have no me i have no me i lost
i lost you
i never had 
i have never had you
i never had myself
 
can you tell me about the end
i think i want to be there

I am bold but I don't matter
What my name is
Where I rise

It's the same when I leave and when I arrive
I'm not allowed to feel alright

We are small and we don't know
Nothing changes
When you're gone

We are delusional
Poor animal

I am not your savior
Save me please



from Poor Animal - Zola Jesus

                                             r e c y c l i n g